1.Mwanamume ni kumwaga ndani,kuwithdraw achia M-pesa
2.Mwanamke ni kuachilia ingie,kukaza achia mechanic
3.Sex ni nyama kwa nyama,CD achia DJ
4.Mwanamume ni BEER,spirits achia waganga
5.Mke ni sura,internal beauty achia minyoo
6.Mke ni kuitwa mama watoto,honey achia nyuki
7.Mwanamke ni figure,standard achia gazeti na KEBS
v8.Mwanamume ni kuoga twice aweek,daily achia nation.
Man : I have been waiting for this day
Lady : Do you want me to leave?
Man : No
Lady : Do you love me?
Man : Of course
Lady : Will you ever cheat me?
Man : Never in my life
Lady : Will you ever hug me?
Man : Every chance I get
Lady : Will you hit me?
Man : Are you crazy?
Lady : Can I trust you?
Man : Yes
Lady : Sweet heart
One day a woman wanted to know how the husband would react if she left without telling him where she had gone. So she decided to write him a letter saying she is tired of him and didn’t want to live with him anymore and after writing she put the letter on the table in the bedroom and then hid under the bed…When the husband came back home, saw the letter and read it, he replied on the same paper and then began to sing and dance changing his clothes. He got his phone, dialled someone then said: “Hey babe, am just changing clothes then will join you, as for the other fool it has finally dawned on her that I was fooling around with her and has left. I was wrong..really wrong to have married her, I wish I had known you earlier. See you soon honey!” The husband walked out of the room and left. In tears and very upset, the woman got up from under the bed and decided to go and read what the husband wrote on the letter. When she got the letter, it said: “I COULD see your feet under the bed, I didn’t make any phone call.. I am going to buy bread. Stand up, stop your silly games and prepare me a meal….
I LOVE YOU!
A wife was making a breakfast of fried eggs for her husband. Suddenly, her husband burst into the kitchen. “Careful,” he said, “CAREFUL! Put in some more butter!
“Oh my gosh! You’re cooking too many at once. TOO MANY! Turn them! TURN THEM NOW! We need more butter. Oh my gosh! WHERE are we going to get MORE BUTTER? They’re going to STICK! Careful. CAREFUL! I said be CAREFUL! You NEVER listen to me when you’re cooking! Never! Turn them! Hurry up! Are you CRAZY? Have you LOST your mind?”
“Don’t forget to salt them. You know you always forget to salt them. Use … the … Salt! USE THE SALT! THE SALT!”
The wife stared at him. “What in the world is wrong with you? You think I don’t know how to fry a couple of eggs?”
The husband calmly replied, “Am just behaving the way you behave when am driving!” …